With much of the world on coronavirus lockdown, there are warnings that those living with domestic abuse could become hidden victims of the pandemic.
In the UK, calls to the national abuse hotline went up by 65% this weekend, according to the domestic abuse commissioner for England and Wales. Meanwhile, the UN has warned that women in poorer countries and smaller homes are likely to have fewer ways to report abuse.
A complete lockdown means every day is completely disturbed. There are now no local grocers with carts so everyone needs to travel further to any nearest supermarket for food every day.
“Stressful situations like this means that there are more things that trigger their already abusive partners.”
WOMEN When asked on FACEBOOK Platform what women are going through in these lockdown seasons
The responses have been awry, in Nigeria the battle of side chicks taking over their husbands have wound down as most women have their husbands home, social media influencers, women advocate and counselors have called on Nigeria women to be at their best behavior otherwise they could loose their men,
The good and the bad of lockdown.
From the responses 30 percent of the women have complained that they never knew their husbands were sex maniacs until recently when they began asking for too much sex, with 40% of them regretting that their private parts are suffering the lockdown the most due to high demand for sex
while women who are currently under lockdown with men who they say have abused them in the past says they now live on the edge.
The first night of the lockdown he had come home drunk and upset. The coronavirus outbreak meant fewer people were buying goods from him, he deals on Building materials. For this one week I ask myself “How many days will be like this?” he shouted, throwing a bottle of the spirit he’d been drinking against the wall. My children scrambled behind me for shelter, I led them to the sitting room until he fell asleep. “They’ve seen their father angry many times in their life but the past few days it has been worse. They’ve seen him throw things against the wall and pull me by the hair.” I really can’t think of any pleasant moment for now.
EWR- How about using sex to distract him. We know that sex is a powerful tool?
Monica- How do you want me to keep opening my legs to a man who constantly abuse me, if he wants sex from me he should treat me well, I am not a piece of furniture otherwise he should go to where he normally gets it from, for me I am still in this house for my four kids, I am not from this town and I wouldn’t want to leave my kids for anyone else to raise. I sell provision in the market, and that’s what’s keeps me going.
Mrs. IHUOMA said on a typical day she would walk a kilometer or two to her friend’s house to while her time away so as not attract any wrought from her husband who has always abused her and in coping with the lockdown, to avoid been beaten in front of her kids who otherwise would be in school when the beating takes place are home and having two male boys and girl, she doesn’t want her sons growing up thinking its ok to hit a woman at any slight provocation.
She said ‘’I arrived at this best approach because of my children are home my friends advised me so, to be the one that will leave the house for him and come back at meal time to prepare another meal, this way I won’t get in his way and he won’t get on my way. My children are the one at receiving end and I thank god the boys are growing and they have reached where they insist on what they want, so I guess he has noticed the change and is since behaving well with them, he simply talks to them now, in the past he hits them at the slightest mistake but that has changed now from my observation. They children simply calls me on the phone to say daddy is hungry and I come to give him food even though he didn’t drop any money for food.’’
Mathilda George says husband has hit her more times than she can remember, the first time was 5 days after their wedding night. He has a way of begging me to stay afterwards. I can’t even tell if I don’t enjoy because he would come begging with gifts. She said ‘’I tried to leave him once, but he wouldn’t let me take the children, if not for the lockdown my day starts with buying the household food for the day and would start preparing breakfast. Her husband would leave home at around 7am, returning for lunch and a nap, leaving again after the two older children returned from school.
But things changed when the school closed on the 23rd March2020, she said “Then the children were home constantly and they began to irritate my husband. “Usually he saves his anger for me, but he has begun to yell at them for minor things like leaving a cup on the floor. I then say something to divert his attention so he can be angry at me, but the more time we are together, the less I can think of to distract him.” I can’t wait for this lockdown to over I am tired of the whole situation.